My Vertigo II


That Friday morning of March, I arrived at the gym early enough to keep myself busy taking pictures of the club where it is situated. Then, I waited inside for the class to start. During that interregnum, before the teacher clapped her hands to announce that the lesson had begun, one of my tae bo colleagues approached and without a single shadow of shyness said:


“You are looking so good! Your body is just nice to look at…”


I couldn’t imagine such bold compliment possible, but it was coming from a very nice fit lady. So I welcomed it.


“Thanks. You look well too…” I replied.


“But this mirror in front of us tells me a completely different story…” complained she.


“Don’t believe in mirrors. They usually lie. I believe more in your words than in mirror images. I know I am fit and should be feeling well. However, I’ve been prone to sudden giddiness.”


It turned out she is an athlete and a psychotherapist, and immediately advanced with probable causes: bone or ear trauma.


“Anyway,” she added, “you must check it with no delays.”


“I will,” guaranteed I.


In fact, my present seems to be full of people giving opinions or doing exams. So far the reasons and exams have been copious: 1) Low blood pressure – now stabilized to an optimum rate. 2) Heart and arteries – couldn’t be better. 3) Medical exam result – super fit. 4) Cholesterol – OK. 5) Anemia – OK. 6) Other blood exams – except for a touch of sugar (6 instead of ideal 5) all os OK . 7) Thyroid – OK. 8) Unknown virus – only time can cure it. 9) Hot weather – air conditioner and winter (this is Andy’s explanation and remedy for my dizziness). 10) Consequence of food poisoning while in Europe – time, healthy food and rest required. 11) Central nerve affected because of eating something my body rejects – time to heal the shock highly suggested. 12) Stress – why now if I live stressful situations since… 13) Ladies usual complains – very well, thank you. 14) Lack of water – could be before, but now my stomach is like a swimming pool. 15) Sleep deprivation – could be too, but then why now if my sleep patterns are the same? (This is JP’s explanation, my favorite of them all. It looks so easy to cure!) 16) Need of outdoor life – yes, but who doesn’t? 17) Ears – consult a.s.a.p. in Maputo. 18) Eyes – consult a.s.a.p. in South Africa. 19) Bone injury and a couple of other common exams – a.s.a.p. in South Africa.


I’ve spent ten minutes before class thinking of my vertigo saga. I am used to feel in the clouds and I want to be that good again. I am not used to feel bad and sick, especially when the feeling is beyond any logic and my own control.


Just moments before the energetic clap of hands starting our tae bo routine, I looked outside at the blue sky and blue sea, always so present in my life, and took a decision: when my exams are over, and if no reason for my dizziness is found, I am going to eat my pride for supper. I’ll welcome the unacceptable, as acceptable. I’ll look at the unreasonable, as reasonable. And just for now I will survive.